mommys day.

before i was myself you made me, me
with love and patience, discipline and tears,
then bit by bit stepped back to set me free,

allowing me to sail upon my sea,
though well within the headlands of your fears
before i was myself you made me, me

with dreams enough of what i was to be
and hopes that would be sculpted by the years,
then bit by bit stepped back to set me free,

relinquishing your powers gradually
as dancers when the last sweet cadence nears
bit by bit stepped back to set me free.

for love inspires learning naturally:
the mind assents to what the heart reveres
and so it was through love you made me, me
by slowly stepping back to set me free.

happy mommys day to all the ladies out there, whether single or joined. you all are very hardworking, whether tough or meek, and you all deserve this day. muah!

prayers for VA Tech.

I had come here to write a righteous blog and yadda yadda...but then i checked facebook.

i notice black ribbons and "VT" everywhere, so i ask a friend what is going on.

apparently there was a mass shooting today at Virgina Tech.

now i dont know anyone at Virginia Tech, but I do send out my prayers. it's such a tragedy when things like this happen. especially when innocent people are harmed and killed. as i read stories on the incident, i couldnt help but tear up. it hit home because i am a college student, and i can only imagine being in class and someone bursts in, shoots my professor in the head, and proceeds to shoot my peers. i can only imagine what's going on in the minds of the students...its a sad day indeed.

my heart goes out to them...

life is like a football game.

"life is like a football game. you see the goal, you get the ball and you run for it. then out of nowhere, you get tackled. thats how life is. you get hit from all directions...but in football, you expect it. you have to expect it in life as well. learn how to handle your problems so when youre faced with them, youre not taken back. get in a huddle and regroup..." -- my boss.

who says you can't learn anything at work. lol.

its seeming as if '07 is the year of realizations. realizing your potential and running with it. realizing your passion and making it happen. like the ms. sooo brooklyn renee eloquently put it:

"2007: A Time To Step Ya Game Up! Go Hard or Go The F*ck Home! LOL"

thats right.

365 days in a year.

wow its been a year since i left rochester...its amazing what 365 days can do for a person.

the changes that can be made. the relationships that eventually crumble. the things you find out when you remove yourself from situations. the potential you see within yourself. the opportunities that arise. the new friends you make.

if you told me a year ago that i'd be in the place i am today, i'd laugh and say "YEAH RIGHT!! i'm gonna be living in this Colony Manor apartment for the rest of my college career. i'm gonna eat in the SAU and be drunk every weekend. i'm gonna be a business major and i'm gonna be mooching off of freshmen/sophomores for their debit and meal plans. nyc?! what?! youre crazy!!"

...and here i am.

i remember having a conversation with a friend one night right before i left. and they asked for a hug. and i said man get off me, you can always get a hug. and they said "no i want one now. who knows? a year from now, i might not be able to do this...". needless to say, that was one of the last times i saw that friend before i left.

so as i sit here and reflect, i'd just like to thank all the friends that stuck by me through the transition. all the people that were my REAL friends...(lol its funny to think about "friends" now. if you would've asked me freshman year, i'd tell you that EVERYONE was my friend. now i know, real friends are hard to come by. so love, honor and cherish the ones that you have...). i'd also like to say how happy i am to be here. if i didnt come home, i would not have met such wonderful people and been blessed with the opportunities that have come my way. i wouldnt be having the fun im having, and i for DAMN sure wouldn't know the truth about a lot of things that i was dealing with in rochester...

to those who i've become closer with since i LEFT rochester, let me tell you how much of a pleasure its been!! i cant believe i wasnt closer with you when i was there, but trust me when i get back we are definitely cuttin up!!

let me add that these past twelve months, looking from the outside in, i have seen the growth in so many of you. i am so proud of you guys, really i am. keep your heads up and stay strong, and everything that you are meant to be, you will become.

...cant wait to see you guys this summer :)

checking out.

"we have become contemporary landfills. a bulemic society of sorts" -- professor gal.

my photography professor is amazing...anywho lol.

...so in photo we were speaking on the state of our society and how information is no longer retained. we are force fed millions of images a day, and our minds just cant latch on to much. so professor gal presented this idea of us being contemporary landfills. our minds hold nothing but waste. we know all the lyrics to the songs on our ipods and can almost automatically recite a line from a tv show or movie, but dont know anything useful and worth knowing...

so then the issue of "checking out" came into play. to escape our own realities, we watch tv and "check out"...my peers and i came to the conclusion that checking out can be potentially detrimental. one can get into the habit of "checking out" to the point where they don't recognize their own reality anymore.

...so one of my classmates mentions that she did an experiment once. she didnt watch tv or movies for a week, just to see the difference it would make in her habits. she found that she connected with herself more because there was nothing to deter or distract her from finding herself. she wrote more, read more, and just understood herself a little better in that one week.

my tv broke last summer, and i have yet to replace it lol. once you dont have it, you realize how much you really dont need it. just something to think about...

the black arts.

james weldon johnson once said:

“The final measure of the greatness of all peoples is the amount and standard of the literature and all they have produced. The world does not know that a people is great until that people produces great literature and art.”

now i know there are a load of black & urban fashion designers (deluxxe de'coi, kissed by rain, lavie, hiqee, lemar & dauley, mocha flava, 1 soul designs, vixen kitty, etc etc), a plethora of rappers/singers, and spoken word/poetry out the wazoo...but i cant remember the last time i heard of a black artist. artist in the sense of painting/sculpture/photography/etc etc...pardon my ignorance. i just cant think of any...

...so a couple of questions i have are:

• has the definition of art shifted to focus more on profit?
  
• does anyone know any black painters/sculptors/photographers/etc, cuz i would like to know some lol...

dont get me wrong. i love the fashion and the poetry...ehhh on the music lol. but i was just wondering if there was more out there.

this is me.

the only thing constant in the world is change
thats why today i take life as it comes. -- "growth" by india.irie

kind of sums up how im feeling right now.

a little overwhelmed but loving everything that i'm doing. im thankful for it all.